Honesty: Psalms 57 & 142
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
In order to escape King Saul's jealous, murderous rage, David, though innocent, had to run for his life. He soon found himself a wanderer, a nomad, looking for any safe place that might provide protection for a little while. During that time, he found a cave to live in, and he wrote two psalms while living there. Psalm 57 is very hopeful. Psalm 142 is discouraged, fighting for hope.
Whether hopeful or hopeless, David converges on the same idea. In the encouraged psalm, David says, "I cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills his purpose for me" (57:2). In the discouraged psalm, David says, "When my spirit faints within me, you know my way!" (142:3).
These thoughts run along parallel lines: God knows why David is in the cave. God has a “purpose,” and “knows my way.” The cave and the situation that caused it are not bigger than God. God is still attentive and even present in the cave. God, who is wiser than David, has him in the cave for some perfect, invisible purpose. All of this is what David believes, no matter how he feels about it.
We have a similar saying: "Everything happens for a reason." It's true, but truth and emotion are not always in sync. Sometimes they are, like in Psalm 57, but not so in Psalm 142. When he is discouraged, in Psalm 142, David knows that God knows his way, but a lot of other people know his way too, people who are putting traps in his way (3-4). It feels like no one cares about him and that he has no refuge (4). He knows that's not true because he frequently cried out to the Lord to be his refuge (5). And yet, despite those frequent prayers, it still feels like he is alone, and he is desperate for God to listen to him (6). In fact, the cave that feels so strong in the storms and reminds him of God's protection (Psalm 57:1) also, at times, feels like a prison (Psalm 142:7).
Truth and emotion, knowing and feeling, are not always in sync. Yes, we who hope in God, who trust in his Son Jesus Christ, believe that everything does indeed happen for a reason, because God knows our way and fulfills his purpose that he has for us. Because God is all-wise, all-powerful, and all-loving, everything does happen for a good, wise, loving reason.
But maybe we should be careful how we use that phrase when helping others. We should discern when they believe the truth but their emotions haven't caught up. It’s ok if "I pour out my complaint before him. I tell my trouble before him." In such moments, rather than push truth already believed, let’s encourage respectful honesty with God, which is how relationships thrive. It's ok to be discouraged. Psalm 142 encourages us to vocalize discouragement, rather than suppress it. Not to vocalize it sinfully, in selfishness or disrespectfulness. We don't "get mad at God because he can take it." But we can certainly be honest about our feelings with him. We tell ourselves the truth about God, and we tell God the truth about ourselves.